I'll post something great next week....
Ok so I'm really terrible at posting much of anything during the school year! I know that all of my faithful readers have grown tired of checking back to find old (and lets face it lame) posts.I'm tempted to say that I dont have time to post right now- but will soon.
I always fight the temptation to feel that 'life' hasn't begun yet- that 'life' is always scheduled to begin when I will have more time...next week, next month, after the semester is finished, when school is finished (when I finally unpack my apartment!)- whenever. But then suddenly I realize that the scheduled life hasn't arrived. And I'm asking, "Well then, exactly what is all this time right now- the scrambly madness?"
I don't want to feel that I don't have time to be living my life right now. This is my life.
Don't get me wrong- I wouldn't do what I'm doing if I didn't like it. Just sometimes I feel so rushed through everyday, the days seem to blur into one another. I realize (mostly because other people point out to me) that I do too much. I have more than a full course load of intense university classes. I work too much. I commit to too many things. Why??! Do I have some sense that if I just sat still that I wouldn't have any worth? That the measure of who I am is how much stuff I do? Do I look for praise from other people that I manage to pull it all off somehow?
Maybe. I also don't want to feel like I'm wasting the one life I've got. I want to live it the best I can.
How do I reconcile wanting to do so many things with slowing down enough to enjoy them?
So I haven't the sagely wisdom on how to live life to its fullest yet... But who does?
posted by Megan @ 9:15 p.m.
3 Comments:
Don't worry, you have at least one faithfull reader and commenter left on this planet. Hey, if you want life to slow down, move to a country where you have no friend and no one who speaks your language (well except your hubby in my case). THen you have lots of time. But then actually, I still don't have the time to read the books I brought with me to read "while I has time in Korea". Funny how that works eh? You think it will slow down around the bend and it never does. Enough from me. This is your blog, not mine. Hope you have some time to sit and enjoy life and those around you. Miss you!
ah young grasshopper. you know what i find helps? stop showering. creates all sorts of time! you're welcome.
Actually Rose, my two year no-showering experiment has saved me very little time, if any. Although come to think of it, people don't come and bother me nearly as much these days...
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