dont you think its time

this is my last year of school. all of a sudden all of the questions about what I plan to do when I am done need some serious evaluating. and i feel really pressured about it. not from others, but from myself. this past year was really challenging for me. australia was an adventure in a fashion that i hadnt planned. and i still dont feel like ive had time to reflect on my time there and how it impacted and changed me. or if it did. although i think it must have.

i love the challenge of school and i almost feel sorry that im only now feeling like im getting the hang of it. i think that if i had done my four years consecutively like most normal people do, i might actually have achieved better grades. its all about learning how to succeed in the system. but im not normal and it only seems normal that i wouldnt be normal like normal people.

but now that im feeling more confident in university- the less confident i feel about succeeding outside of university. im not sure what kind of jobs to apply for that will be interesting and challenging (and pay money) that i have any shot of getting. competition is fierce!

i also have so many goals and dreams its hard to sort out which come before others. or sometimes even to remember them all. i made a list not too long ago. but i lost it. i am the queen of making lists. i love lists. i dont usually follow them but writing things down to see them helps me to organize my thoughts and increases the chances of things getting done or remembered.

posted by Megan @ 10:17 p.m.